


Beautiful Simmonon Role Too Good For This World, Too Pure

by Karimshot



Category: Kingkiller Chronicles - Patrick Rothfuss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:54:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28171995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karimshot/pseuds/Karimshot
Summary: My apologies to The Onion writer(s) who came up with the original.
Kudos: 3





	Beautiful Simmonon Role Too Good For This World, Too Pure

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Beautiful Cinnamon Roll Too Good For This World, Too Pure](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/728553) by The Onion. 



> I discovered this on a friend's old laptop. I apparently write "Kingkiller" fanfiction to amuse people a lot.

Imre, CW—Citing the character’s sweet, sensitive personality and boyish grin, sources confirmed last Cendling that beautiful Simmon was simply too pure for the world, too perfect. “Look at his angelic face. Never in my life have I laid eyes on someone so hopelessly doting, nor glimpsed a personality as delectably sweet,” exclaimed Imre resident Marea Lant, before realising that perhaps such a flawless, delicate person was not meant for this earthly realm. “Alas, we toil in far too cold and dark a world for a story role of such Simmononed purity as this, such perfection, whose rich, Eld Vintic poetry conjures the divine.” As of press time, Simmon was alive and well, but rumours that this “prince” would be skewered by a psychopathic kingkiller in the upcoming, final book entry persist.


End file.
